Under Construction!

 The Chronicles of Two Asshole Wannabes   
   From the Bowels of Humanity We Creep.  This Page.  This Page is What We Are All About.  This is the Page You Glance At and Say, "Wow, These Guys Are Cooler Than Me." Yes, We Are.
The First Escapade:
On, what I believe was, October the 14th, Charles Borrowman and Patrick Wiley embarked on the journey that would spawn the Two Asshole Wannabes.  After spending a few days scoping out areas to carry out their trek with no luck, they finally said "F**k It" and headed straight into the heart of the Wilderness.  

Unfortunately, Charles had to run some errands, namely paying a deductible on the new appartment that he and his girlfriend would be moving into.  So, the Two Asshole Wannabes would be unable to make it anywhere near the woods until late in the afternoon.  When they finally made it up a road leading into the dense foliage, they had to find a spot to park, a monumental task in itself.

After parking, and launching themselves off of a cliff onto some train tracks, they began to trek.  And at this point trekking meant...literally walking.

With only one backpack each, a single bowdrill kit, one water bottle each, a change of clothes, knives, a burn bowl, some left over Taco Bell, and some Spicy Nacho Doritos, they walked into the heart of the wilderness to show the entire World how it's done.
Phase One, Escapade One:

With time quickly running out, Charles and Patrick are forced to make a pivotal decision:  Journey into the woods where resources will be plentiful, but light will run out quicker, or stay on the sandy shore near the river where light will last a little longer, but resources will be nearly non-existant. 

Their decision:  The sandy shore.  Two reasons.  First, they knew their race against time in the woods would be nearly impossible for them to complete with the 1.5 hours of sunlight they had to spare.  Furthermore, Patrick and Charles were planning on sharing a lean-two shelter, and the sand provided a safe/comfortable environment for their fire/lean-two combination. 

They failed to construct an adequate shelter, running out of sunlight  too quickly for them to complete the size of lean-two they needed to build.  By the time the sunlight was lost they had only completed a frame, with about 2/3 of the ribs they needed for heat reflection to be effective at all, and a thin insulating layer of leaves to escape the Earth's vampiric power.  At this point they decided to switch gears.

With approximately 10 minutes of daylight left they knew their shelter wasn't going to be completed.  Fortunately, there wasn't any threat of precipitation, and they knew this.  So, they made the normally unadvisable decision to skip completing the 'shelter' step in the "Order of Survival", taught to them by Chris Schitsome, and work on a fire.  If they could complete  making a fire they knew they could survive the night without freezing to death, a risky choice.  Patrick pulled out his bowdrill and got to work, while Charles worked on gathering firewood to get through the night.  They succeeded. 

The first night was brutal, neither Patrick nor Charles slept at all.  They sat, or layed, curled around their fire all night constantly stoking it to avoid freezing; despite having a fire they were incredibly cold, not to mention exhausted, but they survived.  Hopes were still high for a recovery the next day.
Charles Desperately Clearing the Inside of Our Frame                             Our Shelter Right Before Switching Gears to Fire                           Patrick Smiling After a Fire Success, That Smile Faded